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There’s no way around it. There’s no feeling in the world that compares to really great sex. Whether you’re the bottom feeling the sensation of a beautiful, shapely tool thrusting up inside of you. Or you’re a top feeling the womb-like warmth of the anal canal hugging your member; sex is incredible.
A lot of straight people feel sorry for what they imagine is us being forced into “settling” for anal sex. Unluckily for these people, they’re unlikely ever to feel how incredible anal sex can be for anyone brave enough to give it a try.
Regardless of how great it is; anal sex is not for those who refuse to put in the preparation. You need to prepare to turn that one-way backstreet into a two-lane highway.
By day your asshole is a street that ferries waste to the dump. But by night, it can bring in 6 to 12 inches of burning hot pleasure in the opposite direction. This doesn’t just “happen,” gentlemen.
The following guide isn’t for everyone.
For those readers who live the power-bottom life, you’re probably an expert in the fine arts of douchery. You probably already live by a code and a system that rivals that of aerospace engineers.
But for those of us that don’t bottom often. Maybe you haven’t ever bottomed before. Or if you are just cleaning up in preparation for a lip-bitingly amazing rim job; this guide may help.
The first thing you’ll need is the douche itself. You can use a squeeze bottle that reliably squirts water. However, it’s much better for you to buy a real-life douche.
A douche has a compartment that holds the water and a long spout that you’ll insert up into your anus. The general idea is that you’re going to squirt water inside yourself until the water coming out runs clear.
Most douches are for vaginas, but these will work fine. If it comes with a sachet of vagina PH powder or whatever those ladies need, throw it out.
You’re just going to need room temperature clean water loaded in the douche.
The next thing is lube. Applying lube to the douche itself is going to make pushing that thin spout up inside yourself much easier and more comfortable. Most guys like to stop there. They like to let their sex partner tear open their sexy tight hole with their monster dicks. I, however, am far too scared of pain and also lube up a dildo as part of the process.
So, an additional piece of optional equipment is a dildo. If your man is 8 inches or more, it’s better for you to stretch that hole out yourself. In that way, if he starts pounding away, you’re not left grinding your teeth and begging to Jesus.
Douching is simple; you’re going to fill up the douche and squirt it high up inside yourself. You’ll then sit on the toilet and wait until it all comes out. Then stand up to check if the water is clean. If it’s not clean, fill up the douche and repeat.
The first mistake guys make is not sitting on the toilet long enough. Make sure you relax and let all the water drain out. I like to read a magazine or watch a TV show on my wall-mounted iPad while I douche so I’m not rushing it.
You don’t want a situation where you’re walking to his house in the dead of night, and suddenly water starts pouring out and down your leg. You also don’t want it coming out during sex and all over his dick and balls.
Another mistake is checking that the water is clean, then if it is, ending the douching event too quickly. Give yourself an extra safety douche to be sure. It never hurts to wash yourself one more time for good luck. Shit happens all the time, and sometimes it’s just unavoidable. But being extra careful gives you a much better chance of a great sexual experience. It also gives you much less chance of a brown-explosion all over your partner’s bedsheets.
Lastly, once you’ve finished douching, make sure you have a shower. It’s not enough just to get out all the excrement with the douche and hope for the best.
It’s now time to lather yourself up with soap and water and thoroughly clean your booty all over.
I love to kiss a man’s thighs and ass cheeks before I eat him out. Eventually, I’ll get my dick inside, but if he’s just been sitting on a toilet and didn’t shower; then I’m literally sucking on a bog seat.
No matter what, taking the time for a thorough shower and scrubbing your back down to your knees is doing the right thing for your man.
If you’ve got a beautiful big butt, it’s especially important that you clean all up inside and around those busty cheeks of yours. It’s easy for toilet water to splash up and in your ass area, so make sure you’re thorough and good to go.
Once you’ve lathered up and thoroughly washed, make sure you get all the soap off as much as you can. No-one is looking forward to the subtle flavour of soap on your thighs.
Keep in Mind
Make sure you’re always using condoms and plenty of lube. And make sure your lube is water-based and compatible with your condoms. It’s possible for condoms to break with the wrong lube. It’s also possible for condoms to come off during sex and even get wedged up inside. Take the precautions and be prepared.
To the best of your ability, make sure the man forcing your face into the pillow is trustworthy. Be sure he’s someone who will let you know if something has gone wrong. This can be tough if he’s a Grindr daddy. But generally, you want to know when the condom has come off and is getting forced up into your small intestine.
Trust yourself, and get to know your body. Over time, you’ll learn what works and will avoid disaster while getting down and dirty between the sheets.
- You may also like Demanding Condoms in Botswana Prisons
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